I'm trying to get a better understanding ...?

In recent conversations with a male friend, it became again obvious that men and women communicate on different levels. Women seem to need to go into detail and make sure the person they are talking to understands what they are saying. While men on the other hand don't seem to need the details only the facts. Then its still debatable if they will remember what we have said to them.





Men tend to claim they can't read womens minds yet when we do talk they tend to shut out what we are saying. Sometimes its almost like banging our heads on walls because we are so different.





Don't get me wrong, I'm not bashing anyone ... only trying to understand how to communicate better is all. I love this man and we do spend hours talking I just need to remember to hold my finger over his left ear when I'm saying some thing important so that it has a chance to sink in before it slips out of the other ear.





Anyone have a way for men and women to find a common lever for solid communication?I'm trying to get a better understanding ...?
I think you have the best understanding about communication between the sexes....and that would be the most important to close such a gap is simply recognize there are differences.I'm trying to get a better understanding ...?
You're thinking about it too much-there is no scientific big difference in talking to one another. Just enjoy communicating with someone (man or woman) with respect-if they are interested they're going to remember what you say or at least HOW you said it. So if this fellow your interested in doesn't retain info you'd like him to remember or to be more sensitive about, maybe you need to find a more attentive guy.
Women: try communicating as if U were the man.


Men: try communicating as if U were a woman.
if you had to use sign language would you go through all that detail? probably not. Bring youself down to the communication level of a man. it's brief and to the point.
Men seem to tend to want to solve problems, when the woman just wants him to listen to her. You might try prefacing your conversation by saying, ';I want to tell you about my day. I don't need you to solve my problems, I just want you to listen to me while I vent.'; But, the woman should not go on for hours about her problems; keep it fairly brief so his eyes don't glaze over. And make sure you're not repeating the same details %26amp; events over and over; maybe that's why he's tuning you out.
Their is no level. Men and women are just to diffrent on that topic.
Some guys are very good listeners because they respect what women have to say and others the conversation has to be interesting to them in order to keep their attention. Its a toss up and depends on the guy
women need to be factual and to the point with guys or they lose interest and start tuning out


guys talk 10,000 words a day.. then shut down'


women talk 20,000+ words a day
You're off to a good start, any type of communication helps. Just try to see when's the best time he listens and use words that he'll be more prone to listen to. It takes a long time for a man and a woman to understand each other, especially in a relationship. Over time you guys will start to understand each other
Men speak with what is known as report talk. It consists of essentially, telling someone flat out what they want to say and thats it. Extraneous details are useless and not necessary.





Women speak with Rapport talk, which involves alot more depth of conversation, (and depth isn't necessarily *good* mind you) and spirals out into other inferences.





You see, there is nothing that will make a guy more insane than when a woman calls him up and asks if they can talk about ';stuff';. We men need an objective of a conversation.





Look at it this way, if you spoke French and I spoke English and neither of us understood each others language does that mean we are ignoring one another? Of course not, same thing. If you want a man to understand and address what your saying (and this is only if the man is actually not ignoring you) you need to go directly at it. Avoid nuances, inferences and implied meanings, you want to talk directly to him. Also expect the conversations to be relatively short compared to those with your female friends.





Remember, its not necessarily going in one ear and out the other, you may just be saying alot of things, that to a man, are totally unrelated to the conversation, and the important bits are slipping by.





Then again, he may just be a bad listener.
men are from Venus and women mars.. its a good book.. though i think when you buy it the title is





women are from Venus and men are from mars.